The Flat Earth Society.

 Post #672

19/11  What goes up.

I'm not a fan of those big lumps in the ground.  I do like to see progress under the wheels and it upsets me when snails snigger passing me by on those hill things.  That growling bear seems to follow me too.  The downhill stuff is good, it's just the work it takes to get there!   There's no escaping hills when holidaying in central Victoria so suck it up Foss, get over it!  (Literally!)   Strava maps suggested a few circuits (though defining which ones were tarmac and which were gravel would be good) so I chose a clockwise circuit from Daylesford via Blampied, Kooroocheang, Werona, Yandoit and Franklinford (if only for the place names!)   There's a false sense of security starting a ride downhill; the helmet felt really tight leaving the town at shop squad speed though it wasn't long before the cruel blow of uphill reality struck en-route to Blampied.  5.5% was a wake-up call for this flat earth society member and a sign of things to come.  (The little chainring got it's first taste of chain too!)  

What goes up eventually comes down, a few short descents restoring some faith in progress and donating a little respite.....before the bear growled (again) on the next ascent.   Northwest on Blampied-Kooroocheang Rd was unfamiliar ground, a rough and narrow strip of tarmac (with pot-holes aplenty like home) and a side wind to battle, thankfully without a car in sight.   Kooroocheang was more like an intersection than a place, the population of 64 (sheep) staring at some crazy guy on a bike headed to Werona. There seemed to be more ups than downs in these parts (a headwind wasn't helping either) and doubts on direction beyond Werona forced a halt at Eberys (another intersection, but no sheep) to locate Yandoit-Sandon Rd.  Back on track, a 5.8% climb through Yandoit Hills was double cruelty with a headwind to battle too, that creaking sound was either a spoke or this flat-lander's legs complaining. 

I'd grown familiar with speed in the teens (and the growling bear still following)   Newstead-Hepburn Rd was blessed with the breeze behind but more ups nearing Franklinford destroyed that advantage.  A swing south headed me to Shepherds Flat, the home of cricket bat willow I learned, but my memory was etched with the 8% climb to the appropriately named Elevated Plains and the 11% kick at the top.  (How clever I was to have standard 53/38 rings and a 11-26 cassette!)  Rubber legs didn't like the 4.7% through Hepburn Springs either, though I was pleased to pass (not so rapidly) a 70 year old lady riding to the shop.  Back into Daylesford I needed a therapist to get my head around a 24 average speed, though 955 metres of elevation usually takes me 2 months to clock up, not a day!  

23/11 Back on level ground.

How pleasant to be back on flat earth and maintaining a reasonable speed!  July weather in mid-November had cut a holiday in the south short, so Wednesday had the comfort of being on home soil and the familiar circuit with the familiar circus.  If the social standards stuck I'd have a gentle baptism back into the bunch.  PistolPete had (sensibly) headed north for his holiday so Emil was deputized to take the lead to Mitchell Rd with Troy, Boof, Wozza, Kim, Bo, the 5ft Ninja, Molly, Kreeky, The Godfather, Tina, Bruce, Grumpy, Lenny, Rocket and Kel in tow.  

The standard weekday circuit hasn't changed apart from pot-holes growing larger and a few chicanes thrown in to avoid broken glass, though a noticable change was Molly's return to riding.  Placement in the pack was crucial to make the most of the 13-20 km/h westerly and avoid the headwind home, though those with horsepower in their dna didn't need to worry about that.  Speed was a little spicier than standard (the boost at the backside to blame) as I co-piloted Kreeky to the dip but when Tina and I fronted for duty to the quarter horse stud, we set the speed to social (not just for us but those expecting Wednesday was something stress free)  That lasted till the Ninja was given the reigns and opened the throttle toward rooster corner.  

Some sneaky maneuvering had Wozza and Rocket at the front at the Broken bridges and they seemed content to head the hurry on Boundary Rd too (something to do with The Godfather behind them and about to face Old Dookie Rd's headwind maybe?)  Rocket served the pain of pace for the westerly leg to School Rd while The Godfather was toasted alongside ; the inevitable burst of the boiler and retreat rearward becoming the morning's entertainment.  With a degree of delight, Bo took on the role as co-captain to Central Ave.  Speed to SPC was shy of supersonic with the wind factor thrown in and the slow for Wheeler St's red light got a breath or two back.  On the restart Kreeky's chain jumped off the big ring, balance was lost and Kreeky hit the deck.  He'd escaped bruised but not broken, but wrote off a helmet in the process. Tempo turned tame to the Butter Factory (understandably) where coffee could cure all ills.

24/11 Variable velocities. 

It's easy to turn complacent commuting the stupid o'clock streets with rarely a car in sight......till the surprise arrival of a vehicle at a blind roundabout injects a sudden dose of reality.  How close we all are to becoming a bonnet badge of worse, a rumble strip with just lycra and a layer or two as armour.  And so began a commute of close calls to the shop (stupid o'clock had become peak hour for some strange reason) for a spin of the squirrel circuit, Lili, Tina, Kim, Wendy, the 5ft Ninja, Emil and Molly arriving upright and unscathed.  

LiamM had chosen the cot and a canine for his training and Jen needed a few more winks too, but Emil was well awake to introduce us to the sting of 38's to the truck route (in case some needed a warm-up?)   I figured 35's would reach an accord with the majority (as it usually does) so set that tempo from Doyles to Orrvale.  Wendy followed suit to the Kinder. Predictably, the Ninja's trademark launch opened a few gaps for the southbound stretch of Central Ave but all were back in line again eastbound toward the cypress trees.  Another short burst of horsepower from the Ninja out of Jameson Rd had many digging deep though Kim, probably starved of aerodynamics at second wheel, calmed the hurry toward Beckham's bend. (A decent draft's not always guaranteed in a small bunch and a small squirrel in it doesn't help!)  Lili took the lead with a determined drive to Coach Rd, Tina getting her wish of a recovery ride with a breeze helping her way north. 

Boundary's bridge is the usual aim and Tina handed the lead role to Molly there, her bonus was a couple of passing trucks serving a slipstream till nearing Old Dookie Rd became her limit.  Emil naturally pushed the limits of labor (and some friendships?) making 41's the standard to New Dookie Rd.  He seemed smug handing me the reigns to drive to Lemnos-Cosgrove Rd but I'll bet there'd be some payback served later at home.  Again, I reckoned 35's seemed better suited to the squad (for oxygen intake at least).  The slight south southwester didn't stress Wendy's work west and despite a non-functional derailleur (starved of volts) had the drive to reach Lemnos North Rd (and then the drive to catch the tail as the Ninja bolted into Ford Rd)   Lili took aim at Verney Rd while Molly bid her adieu's to head homeward and despite Tina's turn being due to drive south, Emil's take-over bid for the lead was inevitable.  (his wait till all were aboard was honorable).  Totally out of character, Emiil's pace to Balaclava was less than breakneck speed and what a revelation to find the traffic lights green arriving there! 

25/11 Digestive dramas denied me the therapy of Friday's ride but the weekly average hints I'm getting a fair fix.

This week 158km

YTD 11,758km             

Heroics at a hundred.

 Post #671

12/11 Legends, larrikins and laborers.

Should I see a doctor?  When sleep wouldn't return at 4am and Saturday's ride filled the head, maybe a methadone program was needed to cure the addiction?  (Some preoccupation was on riding royalty attending today and taking Friday off was might have inflamed the symptoms somewhat)    Kim, Tina and Jen had made a slightly hesitant return to Saturdays, albeit with an escape plan if velocity got out of hand, so along with Emil, we had a crew to commute to the start-line.  Fighting a southerly was nothing new.  As expected (and previously arranged), I found IrishBryan circling Sanctuary Drive, seeking the 6am spin.  I came across this legend by chance on Strava 6 months back, posting some monumental training rides as a precursor to his record breaking ride around Australia in May / June.  (14,605km in 44 days ranks him a legend in my books. Yep, 331km a day for 6 weeks straight! Consult your therapist before trying this!)   I was somewhat flattered his visit was to repay the kudos given during his "big lap".   

Good weather brings a good roll-up, today with surprise additions of TrackStan and TatPaul to the list of regulars, Lenny, Bruce, Wozza, PistolPete, the 5ft Ninja, Liam (the younger), Rocket, Boof, Lili, The Godfather, Greg and Bo. PistolPete and Wozza performed the opening ceremony to Mitchell Rd, with no evidence of labor into a headwind (of course).  I'll bet that confirmed the shortcut for the gals!  The initial rush puts a few horrors in the head, throwing doubts on facing the front at that pace, but a few k's later and it's not so bad after all. The engine warms up and the bond of being in a bunch helps the hurt subside.  Oscar was found rolling beyond the truck route. 

A keen speed along River Rd had stretched a few so an ease off the throttle into Coach Rd allowed a family reunion.  Today was a bunch of mixed grades but the social adhesion is strong enough to keep the team together (till the end anyway!)   Some, who shall remain nameless, took the chance to book a later flight at the front and ducked for shelter in the left line on the reunion, so I'd moved closer to doing duty on IrishBryan's wheel by the time Boundary Rd was blurring under the wheels.  Tina, Kim and Jen took the civilized speed shortcut to Lemnos-Cosgrove Rd as the Colombian and the Irishman led us to the Toaster on Old Dookie Rd. 

With a little echelon encouragement, I paired with the Irish legend at the bridge and set Pine Lodge North Rd as the target, but preserving prior pace with that southerly at the side withered away the watts I was wanting to get there.  I soldiered on to save face.  PistolPete was most considerate as partner for part two (and praise the Lord I had a tail-wind for it!)   A headlight went overboard as a pot-hole was struck on the northbound leg to the rail-line, the slow for retrieval quite timely for LiamM's clockwise arrival. (A miracle had dragged him from his cot at last)  

The ease of pace had rattled the rhythm of the Ninja who had fronted for duty.  The Godfather's turn came at Pine Lodge Creek with Rocket sneaking up on his wheel. The crew prepared for the circus act to follow.  (It's a one-sided argument between determination and velocity with Rocket as the odds-on bet, but has the side effect of suffering for some of weaker wattage behind).  TrackStan's time off two wheels (a broken wrist) showed when he reached the business end of the bunch ; what the head thought was possible and what the rusty engine delivered equaled a small explosion.  (Shelter in the left line was his safety net).  Trav was another clockwise latecomer to get aboard, the rank and file behind Wozza and Bruce driving Ford Rd were probably pondering the hurry to come as the town came into view.  I've disappointed myself the last few weeks cowering in the caboose for the final fling; it's become a convenient habit to fall back on when the speed gets spicy. (probably the beginning of becoming that belly-aching bloke on the back if I'm not careful!)  None of these boys bite and the worst that could happen would be an o.t.a, so joining the advance line again was my h.t.f.u. therapy. (Look at the bright side Foss; GiantAndy was absent and I might not reach the front anyway.  Yeah, right!)  

With Wanganui done and the effort expended to catch the rush into Rudd Rd, being 2nd wheel to IrishBryan as he and Boof climbed Cemetery hill wasn't looking like a holiday for me!  The Irishman looked spent at Canterbury's roundabout so 'round I went to the driver's seat to minimize my masochism at the front.   38 wasn't too bad for an old bloke, but by Ferguson Rd the tank was dry.  My elbow pleaded for mercy and PistolPete answered the call.  Boof passed me by but a gap had opened behind him.   The very last watts were spent to fill the gap and hold on as Pistol kept 40's on the dial to Tarcoola, the path between parked and passing cars ever thinning.  Boof took the reigns beyond the roundabout and I was in 2nd wheel hell again.  The Knight St dash is only 900 metres long and lasting the distance seemed possible in the slipstream....till Rocket, Wozza, Bruce, Greg (and similar stallions) bolted by for the bragging rights.   And doesn't that throw your head into neutral!  At the back of the line in a blink, Bruce saved my bacon with a tow to the Town Hall.  Chat on thermal efficiency, sore losers and zoning out on distance numbed the circuit's 36 average speed and breakfast filled a very empty tank.

14/11 Calls from clowns! 

With the forecast changing hourly, luck had a window of opportunity open at 5 to clock a few Monday k's.  The northwester would be nasty for most of the circuit but the commute to Sanctuary Drive was sweet.  Forecasts had obviously frightened a few away but Tina, Kreeky, Wozza, Bruce, Bo, Kel, PistolPete, Emil, Rocket and Lenny arrived for the 5:40 habit under a less than welcoming sky.  Emil had a permit from PistolPete to lead us south, 20 metres of silence enjoyed till The Godfather made his late arrival and shattered the serenity.  Pistol formed the advance line nearing the truck route.  My tactics of getting second wheel to Emil wasn't so clever; I'd guaranteed myself a headwind by the time I reached the business end (and I'd led Tina to the same fate).  Bruce and Lenny were well equipped with watts for the north drive to River Rd, and headed west to the bridge, the wind wore away the will to live till finding shelter in the advance line, a discount of 20bpm for this old engine.   

Thick as thieves, Bo and The Godfather paired at the front nearing rooster corner and despite a van approaching fast from the south, entered Coach Rd anyway.  (A Specsavers appointment might be in order)   We've learned not expect accurate calls (and they wouldn't be coherent anyway) so applying our own judgement may have avoided us becoming a bonnet emblem. It seemed appropriate the two clowns should front the wind north to the highway, though The Godfather's encore was to slow and let a westbound car through on Benalla Rd, then cross without a call for the three behind it.   Kel provided a trustworthy turn on Boundary Rd to the fig farm where Tina fronted and aimed at Old Dookie, the wind not as traumatic as I'd expected till turning west.  Emil held back his horsepower so I had some sense of achievement to get to School Rd but that's where he and Pistol turned up the wick to 38's toward Central Ave.   (There went my sense of achievement!)  

Pistol paired with Bruce for the drive to Dobson's and beyond, now nudging 40's to help my sense of inadequacy.  (Headwinds usually slow people down don't they, or am I doing something wrong?)  The speed beyond the truck route stayed about the same, and as legs were already laboring at that rate, there wasn't the usual sting to SPC.  Legs went to jelly turning into Lockwood Rd instead.  

15/11 July revisited.

Enthusiasm had shrunk with the temperature on Tuesday; feels like 3.8 was a rewind to July, but the regret of not riding would crush the mood of the day if I didn't  (aren't the winter layers are getting a decent workout this year!)  The 5ft Ninja, Jen, Tina, Wendy and Emil converged on the Archer St shop for the 5:30 habit, though LiamM and Lili were conspicuous by their absence. Rumors of Molly's return must have been presumptuous too.  Down to the dedicated few......    A tailwind out Channel Rd had Emil excited, his effervescence testing 38's to the truck route.  Not sure he'd get that many takers for that tempo, I tried 36's from Doyles to Orrvale and didn't get any complaints.   Speed soon settled in the 35's when Tina tapped out the 1400 metres of the ChaCha to the Kinder, Wendy excused for a slightly slower speed on Central Ave while going to war with the wind but recouped the losses to the cypress trees.  

The sting in the Sartorius was blamed on Jen for her swift shift to Coach Rd (I'll have what she had for breakfast!) but the effort might have done us all a favor 'cause everyone stayed aboard for the Ninja's bolt to the highway.  She continued to Boundary Rd's bridge, guiding the path between the pot-holes.  The tell-tale click to a smaller sprocket and a lower hunch over the handlebars was a warning from Emil of the energy to come, finding the watts to keep 39's going used up all the oxygen reserved to curse him! I doubted I had the horsepower to hang on till New Dookie Rd but concerns were erased when I was given the reigns at Old Dookie Rd.  (I was Mr. Nice Guy keeping 36's to New Dookie).  Tina escaped the toil of the west southwester while northbound to Lemnos-Cosgrove Rd but Wendy took the bullet west toward Lemnos. Understandably, she shared the suffering with Jen. 

It was impossible to see the 5ft Ninja from 3rd wheel but I expected to see an elbow somewhere on the 3k length of Ford Rd with the wind wearing her down, but she soldiered on to Grahamvale Rd.  (Maybe there's less wind down at that elevation?)  Emil was the proverbial cat on a hot tin roof given the lead toward Verney Rd, I could almost smell the exuberance to drive south to Balaclava as an encore.  His pace was a little presumptuous at first as the line stretched long but a moment off the gas got the carriages back in line.  There'd be a lot of cursing if oxygen wasn't so valuable for the 2k's to Balaclava but old faithful traffic light at red gave us half a minute's respite.

16/11  Mid week meanderings.  

With a total disregard of social speed standards, one would blame the other for the spicy speed to Mitchell Rd, the fact of fighting a west southwester to get there seemed immaterial. (It's always the other guy that sets the speed isn't it?)  Emil might get demerit points from Kim but PistolPete had nobody to answer to.  Bo, Rocket, Boof, Tina, Bruce, Kel and Kreeky had filed behind at 5:40 and, timed to perfection, The Godfather arrived on the roll-out in the attempt to score Pistol's slipstream (therefore getting the last turn at the front).  Predicting his manoeuvre, I beat him to it but probably assigned myself to a headwind turn later.  

The wind was due to swing southwesterly - what's the bet I'd get to face the music in Old Dookie Rd?   The pack was peaceful while Emil and Bruce did the drive to Central Kialla but jaws were flapping to keep the social stuff alive northbound to River Rd.   Although living nearest the start-line, Grumpy arrived late using the truck route as a short-cut to intercept, Bruce and Boof taking care of the tempo to the quarter horse stud (Hallelujah! Pot-holes had been patched!) where the combined chaos of Bo and The Godfather paired to lead us to rooster corner.  (What could possibly go wrong?)  All eyes scanned through the long grass of Coach Rd for traffic and by fluke or fortune, we had a clear passage.  

Birthday boy Kreeky calmed to the social standards at the Broken bridges (river rising again) with Kel cool and compliant alongside.  Grumpy was most civil to level wheels with Kim beyond the bridge and she rose to the occasion of driving to Old Dookie Rd.  Not so timely handing Tina a headwind turn but that's the luck of the draw isn't it?   Tina stuck it out to School Rd but sought my draft as part 2.  PistolPete drew alongside and was keen to get 35's back on the agenda so I was glad to arrive at Central Ave and seek his slipstream beyond.  It's been a while since a puncture paused the pack but Boof changed that near Dobson's (a few minutes to restore oxygen levels for me)   The Godfather's time limit was stretched as Boof stretched a stubborn tyre back on the bead but there wasn't the rush to sprint to SPC when wheels got going again. 

The 50k habit hasn't been broken for a while and it was high time to teach the legs a lesson in distance, so a tap with Tina to Lemnos then fight the wind back to town might just rattle the routine. The southwester must have seen me coming to deliver the hurt homeward.   An extra 20k wasn't much so I set south on Archer to Mitchell, if only to set up a tail-wind home.   With sights at Sanctuary Drive, I'd suddenly scored the Adams family aboard as the rolled out at 8, Frizzy, DeepFry, Hoffy and Apollo Joe in my wake, Indian filed toward the truck route. There seemed to be some sort of sharing of the suffering when Frizzy and DeepFry passed unannounced, but they'd opened a 20 metre gap on the others in Mitchell Rd.  (I think it's the Adams version of teamwork?) With each bunch comes a different language and different standards and it appears Adam's don't have elbows in their dialect.  Velocity is variable too (to say the least).  I did my bit as Mr Selleys (no more gaps) to keep the team together but with the tail end in the gutter, apparently echelon isn't in their dictionary either.  (Only when in another bunch do you appreciate the discipline and standards of your own).  DeepFry disappeared into the Coach Rd distance chasing a solo DocPaul, but the remaining 4 collaborated to reel him in near the highway.  I was ten shy of a ton at Old Dookie Rd so took the chance to abandon ship (great to catch up with Hoffy but the Adams values were becoming a chore) and set west toward home, the southwester really serving a 32 km/h sting for my heroics at a hundred.

17/11 Easier (in Emil's absence!)

With Emil away, I was elected sergeant of squirrels for Thursday and with it came the responsibility of the hallowed first shift.  I'd be applying a little slackening of standards today, not to snail-like speed, but I reckoned 35's would be middle ground to the usual swift stuff out of the blocks. Trouble was, this first effort is three times longer than my standard Doyles to Orrvale turn!  Lucky I had the west southwester to help.  The Ninja, Jen, Tina, Kim, Wendy, Lili and LiamM astern didn't have any grizzles when I handed over the lead crossing the truck route but my concentration should have been sharper for the Ninja's bolt to Orrvale ; I almost lost grip on the caboose.   Jen now had the aerodynamic disadvantage at 2nd wheel but it hadn't troubled her tempo to the Kinder.  Tina scored the wind at the side for Central Ave and was making up for the loss toward the cypress trees till a rogue 'roo forced a slow at Jameson's bend. We were towed to Beckham's by Kim where Wendy did her thing to Coach Rd. 

Lili filled the captain's shoes to the highway and onward to Boundary's bridge (the usual expectation) though LiamM's shift was a bit short when he showed me an elbow at the fig farm. (All those sleep-in's have stunted his performance!)   Consequentially, I needed a few extra watts for the drive to New Dookie Rd.   The Ninja opened up the usual big gap when given the lead but Jen had the horsepower to close it down by Hill Rd, then showed her true form driving the distance to Lemnos.  Most of Ford Rd was covered by Tina's turn and Wendy made up the shortfall to Grahamvale so continued to Verney.  What a change to head south at less than break-neck speed without a take-over bid for the captaincy!, Lili and LiamM dividing the distance diplomatically and timing the traffic lights to green at Balaclava. (Emil must make it red?)

18/11.  I'd like to say the weather stopped me riding Friday, but softness was to blame. (Do the extra k's on Wednesday make up the deficit?) 

This week 308km

YTD 11,600km                    

                  

What watts were wanted.

 Post #670

5/11 The have's and the have not's (horsepower that is!)

Legs going to jelly when rising from the lunchtime table told me the 6am Saturday spin was a quick one.  The usual culprits were to blame ; GiantAndy, Gazza, Rocket and Wozza, all conveniently line astern as if to inflict maximum impact on those of more humble horsepower (like me!).   Is it luck that groups all this wattage together (to intimidate the "have not's") or is it to help their h.t.f.u. factor?  (left to our own devices, we'd probably be sliding down that slippery slope of softness wouldn't we?)   Bruce, Grumpy, Emil, Greg, PistolPete, Boof, Bo and Nev were no slouches either, assembling at Sanctuary's roundabout so Troy, the 5ft Ninja, Lili and I were almost the rank outsiders (funny, we were all line astern too!)   

PistolPete (doesn't surprise you does it?) and Wozza started the squad south with 37's and 8's on the menu and a weak westerly (barely a breeze) got Gazza excited in Mitchell Rd to make 40's de rigueur.  I reckon Troy and Lili were wondering if this Saturday stuff was a good idea, but they were brave enough to join the advance (I felt duty bound to keep an eye on the new recruits so joined the line too)   Pace seemed to have settled in the high 30's on River Rd and plenty of chat in the ranks suggested most had found some comfort with the standard of speed.   

This is a tolerant team so I was sure a slightly slower velocity when the "have not's" got to the front wouldn't cause too much distress. (Snoring maybe?)   Troy was promoted to the front in Coach Rd and kept the tempo tame for Lili who was braving the bike after 3 weeks recovery from Around the Bay (if the horse throws you Lili, get straight back on!)    The air of determination to her drive lasted till reality struck a few hundred meters later, rolling across before the bridges in oxygen overload mode, so I rolled straight over to donate a draft.  Emil shared my thoughts of a tap to the highway in sympathy for Lili's laboring, though 1400 meters later I was starting to suffer too!   Lots of liquid spilt from transported fruit had coated Boundary Rd to give a sticky-tape symphony under 32 wheels - though nowhere near the noise from The Godfather (noted by his absence again).  

The long lamented warmth of Spring sunshine was nearly felt for the eastern effort to the Toaster and with that breeze fading to nothing, the big guns would most likely provide some heat for the western work toward breakfast.  I rejoined the advance again, although a little sceptical of when and where duty might call.  There's that fine line to tread between effort and explosion - sitting in the slipstream does you no favors and making a contribution gives you some sense of worth, but blowing a gasket at the pointy end of the pack is something to avoid, so survival won the day when 40's stretched the tenacity on the last leg of Ford Rd as Wanganui Rd's labor loomed large.  

As focus fixed on Cemetery hill and what watts were wanted beyond Canterbury's roundabout, Troy delivered the news of Lili's o.t.a. so I needed little encouragement to back off the gas to assist; LiamM had opted for sleep over the role of chaperone (and my legs were hating me anyway!)   A little chivalry goes a long way doesn't it?  So I did get a long drive at the front anyway, albeit slower than what my previous fear imagined it.    Speed was set at sustainable to the Butter Factory.  Horizontal hiccups, high paid jobs and education expectations kept bike babble at bay over breakfast.

7/11  Monday Mass.

PistolPete and Emil then Kreeky and Gazza had paired at the front but a long thin left line had strung out behind on the way to the truck route. Not many were ready to front for duty on a Monday.  (Maybe the thought of pairing with Gazza at the business end was a scary one?)  I eventually plucked up the testicular tenacity to join the advance line when it was still empty headed to Mitchell Rd, maybe the southeast breeze would actually help me keep up when it was my turn to front with the young lad?  I'd ignored the 37's and 8's setting the precedence on pace 'cause I'd be setting my speed rather than busting a boiler to keep up with anyone else's. 

 

Emil finished his shift on the north turn to Central Kialla so the 2 k stretch of tarmac to River Rd lay in wait for me.  Gazza was most gracious keeping to 36's.  It was reassuring to hear Tina's voice behind (she'd braved the advance too) so I was counting on part two of my duty being a little easier on this old engine.  I survived part one with Gazz without cardiac complications but Tina wasn't going so easy on me in River Rd ; I had to wait till 300 metres from the bridge for some sort of respite.  

I'd almost got a breath or two back when Bruce and Lenny were asked to captain to the dip, so recovery had to be put on the back burner for a while.  (No rest for the righteous is there!)  A few sentences became possible reaching the quarter horse stud and with plenty still to serve their style of suffering at the front, it seemed likely my 4 k's worth would be the sole sacrifice today.  Jen and Kel towed us to rooster corner.  A trimmer Trav hadn't made a big noise about the new Scott Foil under him and surprisingly, The Godfather wasn't so vocal on his return from a few days of being under the weather, though I reckoned that wouldn't last long!  Not until reaching the fig farm did I realise that Gazza was on the missing list ; he'd u-turned at River Rd's end to head homeward with a niggle in the knee (I doubt from keeping pace with me!)    My neglected chain was lamenting the lack of lube (or was it rusty old joints protesting the pace?)  

Heading homeward on Old Dookie Rd in daylight seemed like a luxury ; did we really tolerate the dark months of winter and it's 36 days of 3 or below? (Ah, we'll all be complaining about the heat soon I guess!) Rocket and Greg helped the propulsion to Central Ave while the Ninja seemed smug at having the perfect position to avoid any turn at all!  Naturally, speed spiked crossing the truck route with sights set on SPC, Bo drawing the short straw to provide the draft for all. 

        

8/11 Syncronised squirrels.

The slightly slower squirrel standard of speed is my savior at times ; the feeling of fighting a losing battle is a regular one (particularly by the sixth spin of the week) so Tuesday's and Thursday's is  therapy so there's something left for the weekend.  The effort wasn't so easy into an east northeaster on Channel Rd, so some sort of respite was planned for the return trip. Pace to the truck route was the usual test set by Emil but I wasn't going to attempt 37's into a headwind ; 35's was enough for me (and I had money on Tina, Jen, Wendy, Lili, Kim and the Ninja thinking likewise)   A bright orange sky lit Tina's way to the Kinder and from there, Jen kept 35's going to the cypress trees.  I'm sure Emil would aim higher but he was outnumbered on the velocity vote.  

Wendy has slipped quickly into the Squirrel standards and delivered us to Beckhams bend where Lili took over the towing duties to the S bend.  Kim was the day's dark horse to ply her pace to Coach Rd, but not content to end it there, pushed on to the highway.  The Ninja had avoided the east northeaster but did a long drive on Boundary to make up for it.  Emil made his second shift from Old to New Dookie Rd but the blast to 40 for the last 400 metres might have created the cusses from behind.  

I had the role of reaching Lemnos-Cosgrove Rd and felt that I'd done Tina a favor towing her to a tailwind turn, but it certainly felt like a northwester at the nose pointing at Lemnos.  Understandably, Tina and Jen shared the load, syncronising the shifts smoothly.  Wendy proved her worth with a long shift on Ford Rd to Grahamvale so Lili had the luck of the shorter drive to Verney, leaving Kim to set us south toward Balaclava Rd.  With elbows firmly fixed and a focus on driving long, her tempo kept the line of eight silent to Pine Rd when....you guessed it!, Emil launched a coup for the captaincy.  Naturally, his trophy at Balaclava Rd was a red light.

9/11 Well, sort of social.

It was worth spending the extra energy entering Archer Rd to sprint for the slipstream of Wozza, Rocket and Boof, the free tow to the grid reserved a few watts for later!  Heaps of headlights lit Sanctuary's roundabout, a perfect 14 degrees with a hint of a southeasterly making ideal conditions for Wednesday's social spin. It even attracted BamBam out of obscurity to get aboard.  Lance was a surprise starter too, and with Bruce, Grumpy, Greg, Kreeky, Kel, The Godfather, the 5ft Ninja, Tina and Troy making up two long lines, PistolPete and Emil towed us to Mitchell Rd.  

Social speed had turned to swift for some reason ; it may have been Emil's exuberance or does a big attendance mean a bigger tempo? Those expecting a quieter pace were quick to tuck into a draft, The Godfather (late arrival) keen to muscle in on PistolPete's wheel.  Plenty had favored the left line for a later shift but those blessed with watts (you know who they are!) had no issue to join the advance.  

Oscar joined the mob in Mitchell Rd and that breeze was subtle at the right shoulder when I was promoted to the right line (though it wasn't a worry; my turn looked likely to be due in Coach Rd where the breeze could make my weak watts look awesome!)   Troy, BamBam and Lance spent short shifts in the driver's seat on River Rd to survive the circuit and the Ninja teamed with Kel aiming at the Broken bridges, though the 5ft one made part two of her shift shorter than her headstem.  So with Tina as team-mate, I headed to the highway, but we were sticking to Wednesday's social standards.  A passing truck  was perfect timing for Tina to be drafted the last 200 metres.  

Boof and The Godfather were put on duty in Boundary Rd and velocity built back up again toward Old Dookie (by the banter at the front, The Godfather was being put to the tempo test)   Wozza turned up the heat when he teamed with The Godfather on Old Dookie and the big fella did well to survive the speed (but don't tell him, I'm not sure they make XXXL helmets!)  Social speed was ignored toward Central Ave (though bits weren't breaking off the back of the bunch) and the habit of a hurry to SPC lay in wait ahead (making Grumpy grumpier), suitably served with speed by Rocket.

10/11 Northeaster nightmares.

Perfect conditions one day, something to grizzle about the next! Wednesday was a bit too good to be true ; mild with barely a breeze is as rare as rocking horse manure! Spring winds had arrived Thursday and the northeaster (17-24 km/h) awoke a few memories of Summer battles ahead.  Why should we get it easy? (Martyrdom needs the negatives to garnish the suffering doesn't it?)   The wind made the commute to the shop a swift one but Tina, Emil, Wendy, Lili, Jen and the 5ft one would all get to grumble about the effort needed to reach Lemnos-Cosgrove Rd before the bliss of a boost at the backside back to the Butter Factory.  It was like the cruelty of a climb before the delight of a downhill for us flat-landers. (Better that the other way around in my books!)  

Consistency is a comfort for many and Emil stuck to the protocols of first shift to the truck route, though 37's with the wind at the left shoulder wasn't so comfortable for me.  Even cutting a couple of k's off wore down my watts on the Doyles to Orrvale leg so I was delighted to hand the workload to Tina.  A scenic sky was a great distraction while I regained some sort of composure in the caboose. Ingesting some of the swarm of insects wasn't the tastiest way to get protein into the diet.  Pace to the cypress trees was kept keen by Wendy where Lili became fifth to work into the wind, somewhat overdressed for the occasion.  

(LiamM again had preferred bed to the bike - won't he be burning up on re-entry to riding!)  Jen picked up the pace from the S bend but dislodged Lili from the rear (it's so easy to burn those remaining few watts to catch the tail when speed spikes on the next shift) but we're not in the business of leaving those labored behind - a short time off the gas had us as a group again.  All were ready to stay aboard for the Ninja's blast toward Boundary Rd and with a considered (mid-field) build of pace across the highway, seven were line astern toward the bridge.  Emil's energy is a bonus for the bunch taking on the wind to New Dookie Rd though I wish I could download some of it to hang on at second wheel.  (With a bit more ballast he'd be a decent draft!) A blast of wind from a passing truck stirred up the steering but my mission was holding the wheel to keep the line intact.  Facing the wind from New Dookie to Lemnos-Cosgrove Rd wasn't easy though I should be grateful the shift was a short one.  

A few trees beyond the disused railway line gave a little shelter as our paths crossed with the southbound Cobbles.  Tina did get a turn with a tailwind today, sharing the joy of the assisted passage to Lemnos with Wendy.  (Does the ego good to find 40's on the Garmin without bursting a boiler)   The standard scenario of Emil driving the southern shift to Balaclava seemed to be set in stone ; Lili and Jen shared Ford Rd's first 3 k's and the Ninja lit the afterburners to Verney (it's ok short stuff, we were on for the last 400 metres!) so Emil kept up the consistency of him heading the way to Balaclava's traffic lights (red, of course)

11/11 The old engine refused to start Friday morning (that flogging a dead horse syndrome) so I softened and slept-in. 

This week 278km

YTD 11,290km             

Holy hazards

 Post #669

30/10 A Sunday in suburbia.

It's said if you don't like Melbourne's weather, just wait five minutes and it'll change.  Well, I'd arrived there Thursday and the first chance to ride was Sunday!  Needless to say, I was indignant, itchy and irate after three days without a fix.  My usual practice was to do the Mordi to metro metres of Beach Rd and back again, but want for a change made St. Kilda the start for a new view on the metropolis (I'll admit an assisting breeze on the way out had something to do with it.  The return I'd worry about later)   Sunday must be somewhat sabbath in the capital ; very few bikes were about at stupid o'clock, particularly southbound.  Not that I was craving company, just being atop a pair of rolling wheels was the prescription needed from three days of starvation.   Although eight degrees wasn't that inviting, stoking the old engine up to a respectable pace would generate a bit of warmth. 

The subtle ups and downs of Black Rock and Beaumaris were twenty minutes south so the almost imperceivable rise and falls of Brighton and Sandringham weren't going to crush the spirits early, passing a few (and being passed by nobody) was certainly massaging the ego too.  Bikes began to appear further south as decent daylight took hold and by Black Rock, a bunch or two began to roll.  I'm not one to gatecrash a bunch un-invited, so sitting 10 metres off the back was the proper place when one pack started south at my pace.  It's a trust thing I guess;  we've all felt that awkward discomfort of a foreigner in a group and the (sometimes) hair-raising habits that go against the grain.  Staying upright in a group begs some sort of standards and trust does take time.  Mordialloc was going to be the about-face place but reasonable progress got me there ahead of schedule, so the theory of an hour out and an hour back became the guide. Beach Rd bumps into the Nepean Highway at Mordi so the southern stuff to Aspendale and Edithvale became the focus.  Straight, flat and several traffic lights wasn't so spectacular but hey, it wasn't Bells Armstrong Rd!  

Seven a.m. became the u-turn time at Chelsea and wasn't that breeze in the face a wake up call -  can't be all beer and skittles ; it was h.t.f.u. time!  Getting my head around a slower speed back was probably a bigger effort than the push forward (accepting you 'aint got the wattage into the wind is a bitter pill to swallow!) so setting a sensible speed and sticking to it was the easy bit.  Homing in on a few northbound junkies and passing them stuck some positives into the skull.  Overly optimistic on overtaking and with sights set at Sandringham, I probably cooked myself on a few of those everso slight inclines at Mentone and Rickett's Point but the odd red traffic light gifted a moment or two to upload some oxygen.  One (young) guy passed me as a reality check.     Bunches began to appear spinning south (sensible o'clock Sundays in these parts it seems) and a concrete strip to separate a bike lane from traffic (in some places) is something new to get used to, but the end was nigh with St.Kilda's marina now in sight.  Basking in the beauty of Bentley's, a McLaren and the some of the joggers on Beaconsfield's parade was a fitting finale.

31/10  Five of the best (and one of the slowpokes)

Emil's "I'm out" seemed strange, though I hadn't looked outside at 4:50 am.  I'd made the decision to ride on the gap appearing on the Bureau's radar and placed the 20-35 km/h northerly on the 'get over it' list.  I hadn't seen the damp on the front verandah as yet, or felt the spots falling from the sky.  "Are you riding" came next and blissfully ignorant of the conditions outside, I replied "I'll risk it".  That quickly changed Emil's tune but committed me to the lap when reality struck me outdoors.  Double jeapordy!  Therein lies the bonus of being in a bunch - commitment and enticement ; if it were a solo spin either of us may have gone back to bed!  I could count the tailwinds to Sanctaury Drive on one hand and ignored Mr Negative in the head hollering hurt for most of the circuit to Old Dookie Rd ; just enjoy mid 30's for 10 k's Foss, without the tax it usually imposes.  A few spits of rain, the damp tarmac and wind whistling between the ears wouldn't do much for attendance at Sanctuary Drive so it came as no surprise to find just Pistol. Rocket, Greg and Wozza as the "weirdo's" ready for duty at 5:39.  Great! Five of the best and a slowpoke to make six.  PistolPete performed his usual opening salvo to Mitchell with Emil at second wheel and me behind him.  (Poorly positioned Foss; I'd get the headwind of Central Kialla up to River Rd as penance and these guys would discover what slow really is!)  

Maybe it was PistolPete's charity that kept him as captain for the second leg to Central Kialla (or maybe that first shift to Mitchell didn't have enough challenge?) but I thanked my lucky stars that Emil would have the headwind to battle to River Rd, and not me!  (Mind you, sitting at second wheel wasn't a lot of fun).  Well out of the league of these lads labor, I still felt compelled to make some sort of contribution, so the opening 2 k's of River Rd wasn't to be sneezed at ; there'd be a lot worse to come.  37's became 36's half way to the bridge (reality has no sympathy for suffering!) so my shift was probably considered cruisy.  Plenty of kudos as I gasped in retreat to the rear was nice though.   Hanging on became the real task as Wozza wound up the watts to the 39's.  I should hide the heart rate display on ye olde Garmin 500 - it only certifies the suffering to see 170's still on show 2 k's later, despite Greg kindly calming the pace by a k in the hour.  

The rooster was silent on the turn into Coach Rd, he was probably sensibly sheltered from the wind, sleeping (like Emil or I would be if we hadn't messaged earlier)  The word headwind isn't in Rocket's dictionary 'cause 38's were on the roster to the highway, PistolPete preserving that pace on Boundary Rd too, though his shift shortened to the Fig Farm.  My sole place of residence now was the caboose - I'd need a tail wind tornado to do what these guys do into a headwind!  Emil's exertion to Old Dookie Rd kept my Chewbacca impersonations going, though the slow to turn west finally dropped the heart rate to 160's.   Wozza's watts to Central Ave tempted dropping off the rear to get a breath back, but taking the easy option gets you nowhere.  There was just Greg's shift to Doyles and Rocket's burst to SPC to survive before the life-giving elixir of coffee could be consumed.  Slightly slower to the truck route gained a breath or two for the squirt to SPC, but jellied legs couldn't catch the crew till their slow at the railway line got me back on board.  34's through the streets to the Butter Factory felt like snail's pace!

2/11  Wasn't Winter o.t.a.? 

Was anybody prepared for Wednesday's feels like 0.1?  (Here's me thinking Winter was o.t.a!)   The sneaky suspicion that the cold might come back had the heavy duty insulation within reach, though applying all those layers needed more minutes in readiness to ride.  A westerly chilled the bones en-route to Sanctuary with Boof, Emil and Tina and although a few regulars were missing from the grid (namely Wozza and Rocket) the 'entertainment' (The Godfather) had returned to the fold.  Positioning at second wheel when PistolPete set the team south into Archer Rd was the tactic to score the tailwind leg of Mitchell Rd, but two rows formed shy of the truck route so I was demoted to last instead.  (More time to prepare for the pain at the pointy end I guess (I just hoped to get the shift done before the headwind home!)  Bruce, Kel, Lenny, Bo and Greg made up the ten to spin the anti-clockwise track, The Godfather (wearing his Road Ranger's hat) warning of yet another pot-hole enlarging at the turn north to Central Kialla.  Maybe we need a radar to keep up with these holy hazards?)   

With Tina ahead and PistolPete behind as I joined the advance, it looked likely a drive fighting the side wind was due for me in Coach Rd. (Gotta do what's due in this game less you slip down the slippery slope of softness and become a permanent feature in the caboose)  Tina had second thoughts about the effort at the front and withdrew to the left line while Bo and Emil headed us toward the highway, so when Bo called it quits nearing Channel Rd (no full block Bo?), I had Emil to measure up to reach the Pub.  I reckon I could get away with calling a roll crossing the highway, hoping I was due a little senior citizen's sympathy?  

PistolPete went easy on the accelerator (just to make me look like I could keep up) but Boundary Rd's bridge looked further than 1200 metres away.  I'd carefully saved one breath reaching there to call "Thanks Pete" before all oxygen was diverted to the recovery in the draft to the fig farm, Greg alongside wasn't getting an answer to his kudos 'cause I had none to spare!  PistolPete and Greg faced the hurt of the headwind on Old Dookie Rd, Boof and The Godfather elected for duty to head us to Dobson's, though The Godfather seemed to be stressed by speed and retreated to the shelter of the left line, sparking sledges aplenty to the truck route.  Bo scored lead duties for the swift shift to SPC.  

3/11 Wonderful one way, work the other.

I'd drawn the short straw when handed the reigns into Lemnos-Cosgrove Rd, a southwester blowing at the left shoulder was in stark contrast to the assisted passage of my first turn in Channel Rd (the usual Doyles to Orrvale)   I'd rather have the toil before the treat, but wind direction isn't a matter of choice.  Grin and bear it old boy!  (This was like being served the black forest gateau before the Brussels sprouts!)  We'd all done our first shift with the prevailing southwester on Channel and Boundary and Emil had driven the last leg north from New Dookie up to Lemnos-Cosgrove (just a millimetre of water still standing and stinking at the little dip) so O'Flaretty's Law applied to me pointing west.  (O'Flaretty reckoned Murphy was an optimist!)  Taking aim at Lemnos North Rd was a bit heroic though finding 34's on the Garmin as I built up speed out of the corner was far better than expected. 

Being this easy this early it was worth aiming long.  Worth it till reality hit me hard at the bridge!  There was another 1500 metres to drive Foss!  (My enthusiasm is my enemy sometimes)  Gaps between the orchards had the sting from that southwester to bear, but I made it to Lemnos North Rd to hand the lead role to Tina.  Hopefully Wendy, the 5ft Ninja, Troy, Jen and Emil would tow me to coffee from here.  (Kim had taken control of the caboose)    Tina's aim at Grahamvale went blurry so she gave Jen the joy of getting there, Wendy doing her duty to Verney Rd where Emil jumped the queue to deliver his drive to Balaclava.  It's as predictable as a politician's u-turn!  And just as predictable as the traffic lights being red when we arrived!             

4/11 Watts wanted. 

It was most likely the mental negatives of pushing into a headwind for 10 k's that did it. I felt like the pea-shooter among the big guns for most of Friday's circuit, despite have a southwester assisting for the short time I'd fronted for duty.  (some days you're on fire, others you're just toasted!)   The empty tank syndrome at the starting grid didn't do much for the confidence but a decent roll-up of Jen, Greg, Bruce, Rocket, Bo, Trav, PistolPete, Kel, Troy, Boof, Liam, Emil, Kreeky, Wozza and Grumpy meant that the load would be well shared.  A hint of orange on the horizon at 5:40 and you could almost smell summer's arrival ; feels like 5 had the head in Winter though.  It certainly was serene minus The Godfather.  

A couple of k's above social speed needed more muscle than my legs could muster so the slipstream was the savior till Central Kialla.  Trav's wheel in the advance line would make a considerate co-pilot when promotion put me at the pointy end though exposed to the south southwester along River Rd wore away the few watts I'd saved.  What's up for the weekend was the social stuff swapping sides as the bunch bore down on the dip but it was watts that I wanted when Trav rolled across after pointing to the tarmac craters at the quarter horse stud.  

I had some sort of urge in the engine at first, but that quickly evaporated a half k into the shift so reluctantly rolled across hoping Jen would have a slightly slower standard of speed. Yeah, as if!  Another 500 metres and I'd flogged this dead horse well and truely, so the white flag was raised for Jen to donate a draft.  She and Liam had no trouble touching the 40's to rooster corner.  Kreeky calmed the rush a little on Coach Rd which may have frustrated a few but my lungs loved it!  Troy was content in the caboose, Wozza and Rocket happy to serve the speed to the highway.  Patched pot-holes are difficult to get used to after weeks of pointing and avoiding though new ones appear almost daily to keep wits sharp (Jen put her new wheels to the test striking one near the old pork palace)   Bo keeps the horrors of a high heart rate off his worry list by not wearing a monitor (I should try that!) reckoning he knows when he's spent (I do too, everything goes blurry!)  Heading home on Old Dookie Rd has a certain comfort (caffeine fix soon!) provided pace doesn't turn supersonic 'cause I need something for the swift bit to SPC. I survived, but had the engine almost miss-firing to stay aboard through town.

This week 256km

YTD 11,012km