For the cruelty....or the coffee after?

 Post #633

12/2  The Saturday habit.

Damn that alarm! What fool set it at 4:35? (Oh yeah, some old guy with a bike....and an obsession)!  The bureau said "feels like 10", the bed was warm and I could hear a wind blowing outside. Eyelids grew heavy......  A millisecond before being sucked in to a sleep-in, I dragged the old engine out of bed and poured some coffee in the tank.  It was Saturday after all!   A ride, a laugh or six, a bit of toil on the front, more coffee, breakfast and a yarn with the possessed.  Why miss it?  The wind (of course) was fair in the face for the 10 km to Sanctuary, not as fierce as Friday's 33 km/h but legs quickly recalled the pain (Emil kindly suppressed his snoring on the commute).  The starting grid (GiantAndy, Lance, Molly, Grumpy, Rocket, Boof, Emil, PistolPete, the 5ft Ninja, Bo, Tina and Kreeky) was eerily quiet.....The Godfather's absence almost deafening!  And where was Greg, Bruce and Wozza? (their wattage would be missed)  PistolPete and Emil released the handbrake to roll the bunch south at 6, tentative till the truck route and with trepidation till passing the pooch house, but upright and up to speed by Mitchell Rd.

There, The Godfather appeared (there goes the serenity!)   The wind had swung a little arriving at Central Kialla, not the help I'd hoped for getting to River Rd.  Now in the advance line, my hopes were on getting to the front with some sort of tail wind, but till then I had oxygen to spare for the social stuff that this Saturday would allow (the bunch wasn't overwhelmed by watts)  Through a few cold patches on Coach Rd put thoughts to July - another winter approaches and with it the joy of yet another 30+ days of 3 or below to come ; but sinking to hibernation only brings the agony of kick-starting the fitness when the weather warms.  (I'll leave that agony to the majority of the Wouldabeens!)  

Time to serve up speed at the front came crossing the Midland, Kreeky reckoned he had little in the tank so that was good news for me (I might manage a decent turn alongside!)   With the fig farm in sight I called a roll, finding the 5ft Ninja as co-pilot to aim at reaching Old Dookie Rd.  Any further and I'd be on the red line.  Turning toward the Toaster surprisingly, the Ninja called a short shift, The Godfather and Bo left to drive east (surprise #2, they behaved themselves!)   

 GiantAndy's big engine dragged us west on Lemnos-Cosgrove Rd, it's length seems never ending but barely measures 6 km. (I need to revisit Bells Armstrong Rd to remember 'never ending'!)  Longer than usual shifts (by those blessed with heaps of horsepower) had us into suburbia and I was still 3rd wheel from the business end. (maybe I'd avoid the spectre of fronting the bunch on Wanganui Rd?)    Lenny, GiantAndy and Rocket relieved me of that task.  Kreeky and Rocket towed us into the breeze in Rudd Rd but my turn came at Canterbury's roundabout.  The Godfather was my co-pilot on the Boulevard (Ninja, Tina and Molly now in the caboose preparing for their exit) so I set Tarcoola's roundabout to end my second shift (so far I'd only contributed 3300 metres to the day's propulsion so it was high time to earn my keep!)  For a little variation,  Balaclava Rd was the course today avoiding the gravel infested last k of the Boulevard.  Unexpected windfalls, blocking the bitter (people, not beer!) and old school transport captured conversation at the Butter Factory. 

14/2  Three therapy.

An alarm malfunction meant I'd miss the 5:40 express from Sanctuary, but WhatsApp showed Wouldabeens Joe (not Tony) and Laura hunting for passengers.  So a casual roll to Kialla Lakes set a serene start to the week.  The bonus was a northeaster to help me there.  Rumors of BamBam participating were greatly exaggerated, odds of him showing up were 60:1 with bookmakers.  Tempo would be a tad tame by Couldabeens standard but with just three tackling the Channel, Coach, Mitchell and Raftery route would mean plenty of driving duty. Joe (not Tony) took on the northbound k to Channel Rd and the first k east to Kensington's roundabout, setting me the task of second shift to the truck route (whether it's Coulda's, Woulda's or Squirrels, funny how these turns are standardized to the usual landmarks)  Laura waited in the wings.  The northeaster stifled speed but by Channel Rd's end most of the route's remainder would be wind assisted, not resisted. Laura's shift to Orrvale started with great intention, it's a shame the reality taxed the tempo in the last 200 metres.  Giuseppe (not Antonio) had the 1200 metres to the Kinder so starting my second shift south on Central Ave needed a little restraint with the wind briefly behind to McFadyen.  The flashing red of a led ahead became my bait to continue on the front beyond the cypress trees.  Was it Nico in a Woulda's kit or a packet of LifeSavers that appeared in the dark?  

Laura was put in charge at the S bend, a few orchards and a raised channel was a sort of shelter for her to sustain swiftness.  Joe (not Tony) steered us into Coach Rd so velocity moved up a rung or two now that the northeaster was helping rather than hindering, my turn again at One Tree Dam to aim at Mitchell (resisting the natural reaction of turning into River Rd)   Mid thirties seemed to meet approval (well, nothing was being thrown at me!)  Mitchell's 6 km length to Central Kialla was diplomatically divided equally among us and wasn't it unique to ride in daylight!  I can't remember the last lap that was spent west to town on the Mitchell / Raftery route, once the staple diet of Couldabeens for the sprint to the suburbs.  No sprint today though, I need to stay on speaking terms with this faction (the Wouldabeens might just be my safety net as age slows me!)  Donating a drive from Melbourne Rd to the kink into Conrod wasn't popular with Laura, apparently I was to tow them both to the finish line but I knew Laura just loved the headwind to reach it! 

15/2  Swifter squirrels.

 

Archer St's shop became the pit stop before the squirrels even got started, 5:30 was fix Tina's tyre time.  (she's back on the tubed Specialized while the tubeless one goes through a troubled tubeless warranty)  Tubed or tubeless, seems punctures are the popular problem of late.  At least The Godfather's stopwatch wasn't ticking!  The delay of just a few minutes seemed to inject a bit of urgency into the lap and with just 5 to share the workload (Jen, Tina, the 5ft Ninja, Emil and I) this was going to be the lap of labor. Rubber stamp Emil doing the first shift to the truck route and me playing second fiddle, Jen, Tina and the Ninja next in line.  Stoking up the old engine to Emil's standard wasn't so hard, it's just driving the distance to Orrvale Rd that was taxing  (the shift starts with great expectation, then descends to great effort to live up to it!)  The inferiority complex keeps the hurry honest.  Jen's a hard act to follow, recovery put on hold while she sped to the Kinder.  I'd hoped Tina may have allowed me a bit more oxygen intake but that was wishful thinking.  This squirrel squad thing is getting out of hand!  

The Ninja drove to the S bend so Emil's shift started a little earlier than usual (time to prepare for pain Foss, the seat of suffering was soon to be mine)  Emil's elbow begged me to the front over Boundary Rd's bridge so with a hint of breeze at the behind and a billiard table smooth tarmac to Old Dookie, I had two things in my favor. (wish the lungs and legs were in my favor too!)   It's as black as the ace of spades at 6am, not long ago we were blinded by the sunrise at this time ; shame there's another 6 weeks of darkness to endure till eastern standard time gives us (short-lived) daylight again. That breeze wasn't much of a battle west on Lemnos-Cosgrove Rd, the big battle was finding something like wattage for my next turn.  Emil's long drive from the main eastern channel to Grahamvale Rd succeeded in cooking me at second wheel, so the 1100 metres to Verney was all I was worth.  Jen could slice the wind back into town. 

16/2  Someone said free beer? 

A long line ahead meant there'd be a fair wait before my shift was due, though a bunch of 19 made it a bit messy at the back when the variables of velocity rippled to the rear.  Trav, Rocket, Liam, GiantAndy, Bo, Greg, the 5ft Ninja, Grumpy, Kreeky, Wozza, Kel, Emil, PistolPete, Tina, Bruce, The Godfather, Lenny and Boof's attendance said the social side of Wednesday is a popular thing.  I'd scored Liam's wheel as the order got sorted to Mitchell Rd but concerns about keeping up could be dealt with later.  Sit back and soak up the slipstream of eight ahead Foss!  

The only difficulty for the moment was hiding from the south southeast breeze.  It wasn't a good idea to start thinking about how many had packed into this peloton or how close wheels and elbows were, the level of trust we put in each other says it's a familiar family we belong to.  Easier up to River Rd but searching for a decent draft toward rooster corner said there was more south than east in the wind.  A brief chat with Wozza, Pistol, Grumpy and Boof in the left line while I advanced in the right diverted the worries of the wind when reaching the front.  Liam kindly turned his tempo to an idle as I dug the depths of determination to get to Boundary Rd's bridge without blowing a gasket.  

Trying to stay alongside Tina when the turn rolled was even harder now that most of the energy had evaporated.  Tina apologized for being slow ; I was delighted she wasn't any faster, I could barely keep up!  I was about to risk a breath to call Tina across but she saved me the trouble (and the oxygen) by calling "I'm done" at the fig farm, The Godfather advancing to to head us to Old Dookie Rd.  The wind had shifted east southeast 'cause west on Old Dookie got easier and subsequently faster, the pressure on performance now lifted with a free tow to town.  Pace was well primed.  Quick work on the Lockwood, Byass, Archer and Fryers route to coffee, competing with commuting traffic turned the bunch into Brown's cows.  

17/2  Thuffering Thursday. 

Here we go again!  Thursday (like Tuesday) has the squirrel habit locked in, and wouldn't it be odd without the struggle into a headwind to the start line!  (and wouldn't it be great to start a lap with a full tank!)   The Ninja and a tubeless Tina were at the shop as Emil, Jen and I rolled in for the 5:30 flagfall.  (Kim's absence again is going to need a note from home!)  Just like the last squirrel spin (and most beforehand), Emil led the charge into Channel Rd with a south southwesterly to set an echelon to. That 1200 metres to Orrvale Rd was already harrowing in my head,  I knew the toil to come so I've only myself to blame for joining in!  

(Do we do this for the challenge or 'cause it feels good when we stop?  Come to think of it, why are any of us knowingly pushing the limits of labor, charging through the darkness at stupid o'clock?  For the cruelty.......or the coffee after?  Best not to think about it Foss, just accept it's part of the addiction!)  A house or three, the Orrvale School and an orchard gave me a little shelter from the wind and just at the point of legs beginning to buckle, a couple of passing cars gave a draft to get me to Orrvale Rd.  I'd managed two good breaths at the back before Jen turned up the turbo on the ChaCha.  By the Kinder the heart rate had dropped just 10 beats ;  maybe Tina's turn into the wind on Central Ave might get me feeling human again?   20 seconds worth of slightly slower was enough to find composure, Tina's turn toward the cypress trees resuming the tempo.   5 feet worth of Ninja was on a mission to polish off Channel Rd so Emil had the northbound pleasure to pace Boundary Rd.  Here we go again, planning for the pain from Old Dookie Rd onward I guess!  Surprise, surprise, Emil showed an elbow at the fig farm, 400 metres early.  

Why I took on my own challenge to still aim at New Dookie Rd I couldn't say, but going beyond the comfort zone is a good thing isn't it?  Predictably, I regretted the target when legs went to jelly shy of the mark   (I wondered if Jen would notice if I hooked a tow rope to her Avanti as she took the lead role?)  I was counting on getting a few breaths back at Lemnos-Cosgrove Rd but Tina was in Struggle Street when Jen crossed the rail-line.  In the spirit of collaboration, Jen eased 10% off the accelerator and the order shuffled to give Tina maximum draft.  I'd suddenly found myself second wheel again!  (What was that about comfort zone Foss?)   It's standard operational procedure to aim at the main channel on the turn west into Lemnos-Cosgrove so keeping tempo to suit Tina allowed my legs and lungs to get there (That's third shift done for me, maybe my last?)  Emil did a long drive into Ford Rd and handed Tina the last 500 to Grahamvale, the 5ft Ninja reaching Verney, so Jen had the wrestle with the wind south to Balaclava.   I did get a 4th shift, at least with coffee as the motivational target, but was released from duty when Jen punctured 300 metres later. 

18/2  Fraternal Friday. 

Not many were keen to advance.  26 km/h worth of south southwesterly fair in the face wasn't so welcoming toward Mitchell Rd, many tucking into PistolPete's slipstream while he tentatively turned up the tempo south of the truck route.  I'd locked in my berth at 5th wheel, 10 k's worth of headwind to the start line justifying my exemption from an early effort.  I was leaving that job to those with wattage!  Rocket, Wozza, Boof, Lenny, Bruce and Emil lined up for duty while Grumpy, The Godfather, Tina, Bo, Jen, Kreeky and Kel seemed happy to wait for their turn to come in due course.  

Tina was tested when Rocket added a little more velocity so a little less hurry kept the fraternity united (and saved a breath or two for the increase in pace no doubt to come)    Wind at the right flank headed to Central Kialla wasn't much fun ; I shouldn't complain though, there'd be little joy at the front!  I'd had luck in getting Kreeky's wheel to follow - Jen was on mine so I'd made note to save something for part two of my appearance at the front (due later ; plenty were ahead had yet to serve their speed)  

In a lather of sweat yesterday and searching for warmth in "feels like 11" today, turning up the effort in River Rd at least built up the internal temperature.  Boof and Emil headed the eastern route to rooster corner.  (start the h.t.f.u. now Foss, at this rate I'd get to the front and have the southwester in Old Dookie Rd!  I'll accept I become anti-social nearer the pointy end of the bunch, the want for oxygen over-rules chat ; whereas division one's can happily carry on a conversation in the drivers seat!  The Cats count was low as we crossed the Midland, their lap predominantly with a head wind not such an attractive proposition?  Bo and Kel did the distance to Old Dookie Rd with Bo on a half wheel habit.  Kreeky co-piloted with Bo from School Rd to Central, so at second wheel the increase in wind resistance already crushed my hopes of a decent turn before it started.  Apologizing to Kreeky in advance for a likely short shift, I'd barely sighted Dobson's bridge when the alarms of impending implosion sounded, the want for wattage to keep up with Jen went unanswered just 400 metres later.  No horsepower, but plenty of humility helped!  I did my best Chewbacca impersonation in her draft.  Coffee cured it 8 minutes later. 

This week 309 km             YTD 1,999 km